What comes to mind when you think of “Self-Care?” Do images of yogis, spa days, meditating and face masks come to mind? Or maybe it’s something you rolled your eyes at in the past but are starting to wonder why your self-love-practicing friends are so much happier than you… or maybe you’re still rolling your eyes. It’s okay.
Lately, I have struggled to feel like I’m really “on my self-care game.” I see how all my friends are taking care of themselves by practicing yoga, reading spiritual growth books, attending full moon circles, and just taking the night off. I’ve wondered how they have the time and money for all this… I mean, those weekly self-care massages add up!
But instead of focusing on what others are doing, what I’m NOT doing and what self-care should look like, I chose to re-define or customize what self-care means to me. And THAT way, I’m essentially living in self-care moments throughout the day.
For example, this past week I was in Santa Monica cat sitting. The change of scenery can feel very refreshing; i’d walk to Bristol Farms every day and get ahi poke from the poke bar and a special fizzy drink. I’d wear one of my favorite dresses when I had no where to be and treat myself to some live music — Beach House and Fleet Foxes at the Hollywood Bowl were just incredible. And mentally, I’d bring my attention to my thoughts. What was present and why? How was I choosing to focus my thoughts and was it helpful?
Despite being on my own for the majority of the time while I was there, I didn’t really feel lonely. I channeled my focus forward and thought about everything that was going right in my life. My music journalism is getting better and going further, opportunities for work seem to be coming up and I feel supported by the universe, and in just a couple weeks I’m going to be a vendor at Desert Daze!
And that’s not to say that I don’t have my doubts. I can work myself into a tailspin over money, arguments and negative thoughts. Ups and downs are part of life — it’s being conscious of what’s actually going on in your head that matters.
So, the next time you find yourself comparing yourself to others, beating yourself up about not making enough time for self-care, know that it’s different for everyone, and you just have to find and follow what it is that makes you feel your best. Are your thoughts propelling you to move forward? Or are they holding you back? What’s the story you’re telling yourself and what’s the truth?
What’s the future you want to create for yourself, and how will you get there? Do what you gotta do to make it happen because when you make time to stop a check in with yourself, take that walk in the middle of your busy day, or dress up just for yourself you get into the magick zone, and that shit is powerful.